Ability To Do Good vs. Wisdom

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Sometimes our desire to do good overshadows our ability to be wise.

What would you have done differently in this scenario...

I worked with a client who was in a long standing relationship.

Every time we met, he'd complain about his relationship with his partner.

The issues with his partner was causing severe financial and emotional stress to a point that his health became at risk and he had to be put on several medications.

His business mirrored his emotions and the weight he carried on his shoulders...tumultuous and too heavy to bear by one person.

Taking on two jobs in addition to his business, he was too exhausted to do much of anything but sleep.

He developed poor eating habits.

He stopped his evening walks.

He didn't meet with his friends anymore.

His health got worse.

This went on for about 8 months.

When asked, "Why do you continue like this knowing what it's doing to you?"

He'd respond, "It'll get better, I know it. I just have to push through. It'll change soon."

Soon, never came.

Then, one day he ended up in the hospital and became temporarily disabled.

After a few weeks, his partner became increasingly unavailable and eventually left him because she couldn't handle the stress that came with caring for another.

Months later, after reconnecting...

In one of our sessions, I asked simply...

"What have you learned since we last spoke?"

His answer was this...

"Sometimes, our desire to do good overshadows our ability to be wise. I knew what I was doing. I knew it was causing me harm. I saw all of the red flags. I thought I could push through it. I thought that if I waited it out, things would change. I thought I could talk through it with her, but no amount of talking changed it."

Wisdom is knowing when to let go of something that's a detriment to yourself.

It doesn't matter what, when, why, who or how it is.

The desire to want to always do the right thing...isn't always the right thing.

Knowing when to let go is a life skill you should exercise whenever and wherever possible.

That could look like...

Letting that well performing employee who's toxic to your work culture go.

Ending a project that added 20 more hours to your week than expected and wasn't in the contract.

Refusing to serve a rude customer.

Walking away from a friend that abuses your kindness.

For You...

What wisdom are you denying right now that you know you should follow?

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